Ten years after graduation, Jessica Miller has planned her triumphant return to southern, elite Duquette University, down to the envious whispers that are sure to follow in her wake. Everyone is going to see the girl she wants them to see—confident, beautiful, indifferent—not the girl she was when she left campus, back when Heather’s murder fractured everything, including the tight bond linking the six friends she’d been closest to since freshman year. Ten years ago, everything fell apart, including the dreams she worked for her whole life—and her relationship with the one person she wasn’t supposed to love.

But not everyone is ready to move on. Not everyone left Duquette ten years ago, and not everyone can let Heather’s murder go unsolved. Someone is determined to trap the real killer, to make the guilty pay. When the six friends are reunited, they will be forced to confront what happened that night—and the years’ worth of secrets each of them would do anything to keep hidden.

Told in racing dual timelines, with a dark campus setting and a darker look at friendship, love, obsession, and ambition, In My Dreams I Hold A Knife is an addictive read you won’t be able to put down.

Amazon Best Book of the Month

Apple Best Book of the Month

One of Library Journal’s Best Debuts of 2021

One of Kobo’s Best Mysteries & Thrillers of 2021

Praise

“Ashley Winstead’s mordant debut novel, In My Dreams I Hold a Knife, is the latest entry in the budding subgenre of 'dark academia,' where the crime narrative takes place on a college campus...At its heart, Winstead’s novel examines what it means to covet the lives of others, no matter the cost.”

— New York Times Book Review

“A twisty, dark puzzle...Fans of books such as The Girl on the Train and Gone Girl will find this book captivating, as will anyone who enjoys being led down a winding, frightening path. Highly recommended.”

— New York Journal of Books

“[A] captivating debut...Winstead does an expert job keeping the reader guessing whodunit. Suspense fans will eagerly await her next.”

— Publishers Weekly

“Packed with intrigue, scandal, and enough twists and turns to match Donna Tartt’s The Secret History.”

— Booklist

“[An] edge-of-your-seat academic thriller...Taut and atmospheric, with scenes from Jessica's childhood and college years interposed with the dramatic events of the present day, In My Dreams I Hold a Knife will keep readers guessing until the very last moment. Perfect for fans of dark academia, the well-drawn characters will remind many of their own college days. In My Dreams I Hold a Knife is a twisty, literary thriller not to be missed.”

— Shelf Awareness

“A complex and deftly crafted psychological thriller of a mystery novel, "In My Dreams I Hold A Knife" showcases author Ashley Winstead's remarkably impressive narrative driven storytelling style. Original, compelling, cogent, "In My Dreams I Hold A Knife" is highly recommended.”

— Midwest Book Review

“An addictive and entertaining thriller.”

— Texas Lifestyle Magazine

“With her ability to weave multiple, distinct characters into a thoroughly well-crafted mystery that is absolutely full of twists, turns, and surprises, Winstead is without a doubt an author to keep an eager eye on.”

— The Nerd Daily

“I really enjoyed this book. It was impossible to put down and I thoroughly enjoyed the dual timelines and different points of view...The characters and their friendships with each other were so dark and gritty, each one more than what they appear on the surface. If you enjoy psychological thrillers about people with secrets, I recommend you check out Winstead’s debut novel.”

— Seattle Book Review

“Nostalgic and sinister, In My Dreams I Hold a Knife whisks the reader back to college. Glory days, unbreakable friendships, all-night parties and a belief that the best in life is ahead of you. But ten years after the murder of one of the East House Seven, the unbreakable bonds may be hiding fractured secrets of a group bound not by loyalty but by fear. Twisty and compulsively readable, In My Dreams I Hold a Knife will have you turning pages late into the night, not just to figure out who murdered beloved Heather Shelby, but to see whether friendships forged under fire can ever be resurrected again.”

— Julie Clark, New York Times bestselling author of The Last Flight

“Fans of The Secret History, Ruth Ware, and Andrea Bartz will devour this dark academic thriller with an addictive locked-room mystery at its core. Ten years after an unsolved campus murder, the victim's best friends reunite, knowing one might be a monster—but is anyone innocent? Over the course of a single shocking night, Ashley Winstead peels back lie after lie, exposing the poisoned roots of ambition, friendship, and belonging itself. An astonishingly sure-footed debut, In My Dreams I Hold a Knife is the definition of compulsive reading. The last page will give you nightmares.”

— Amy Gentry, bestselling author of Good as Gone, Last Woman Standing, and Bad Habits

“With its compelling puzzlebox structure and delightfully ruthless cast of characters, this twisty dark academia thriller will have you flipping pages like you’re pulling an all-nighter to cram for a final. In My Dreams I Hold a Knife is required reading for fans of Donna Tartt's The Secret History and Amy Gentry's Bad Habits.”

— Layne Fargo, author of They Never Learn

“An unsolved murder, dark secrets and dysfunctional college days, all wrapped up in a twisty plot that will keep you flipping pages.”

— Darby Kane, #1 Internationally bestselling author of Pretty Little Wife

“A superb whodunit...Winstead’s clever insights into her characters’ complicated lives and motives will keep readers glued to the page.”

— Plattsburgh Press-Republican

“A gripping page-turner that keeps the reader second-guessing all the way to the end, highly recommended.”

— Midwest Book Review